


A Rose In The War Zone.

by Theemogeneration



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: BAMF Dogs, Character Death, Childhood Trauma, Come Cry With Me, Dogs, F/M, Hurt Merle Dixon, I CRIED NOT GONNA LIE, I Don't Even Know, Kid Fic, Moody Daryl Dixon, Multi, Nice Merle Dixon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Daryl Dixon, because im a big all baby, losing friends and family, paternal, post apocalypse kids, so many tears, there are dogs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-26
Packaged: 2019-09-23 07:52:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 22,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17076338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theemogeneration/pseuds/Theemogeneration
Summary: Rose has got her shit together since the world ended, she's taking care of her younger sister and her chocolate lab, she's doing a great job at it to. With one more run to go to in Atlanta before they'd head off to Canada for the colder weather, Rose thought it'd go over smoothly, in and out with no problem.But of course, the end of the world has got to fuck you up some time.When she comes across a racist redneck and a Korean pizza guy, the ending world decided that time would be now.I really fucking suck at Summaries, but Tbh i'm actually kind of proud of this work, unlike my other disappointments i wrote when i was drunk.





	1. Chapter one: Blue blood and blurred lines

The end of the world, didn't happen like dripping of sand through a hour glass, it was more like someone shot the hour glass and the sand exploded out of it.

Rose had lost a lot during that one main explosion and since then the girl had been on the run with only one person and they both ran, from the dead and the living, both of which were just as deadly as the other.

She was at one of the department stores at the moment, having just had out run a shit ton of zombies who had sprung up from nowhere, the girl didn't catch the name of her newest hideout.

The freckled tanned woman sighed as she stayed still pressed against the wall trying to stay hidden for the time being,

Outside was to much for her at the moment, to many zombies and to many noises to draw them here, Rose knew jane would be okay. She just hope the people she had killed, didn't have friends. The mall was quiet..but there was someone here...a thickness in the air which shifted, making her certain she was not alone.

Great.

There was a fifty fifty chance that they'd be good or they'd try to kill her. Neither was a good option. If they were good it was likely they'd die eventually, or want her to go with them...if they were bad..well the outcome was the same.

"Glenn get the doors...what the fuck was that about...where did they come from?" There was a harsh southern accented bark, similar to the men she had just killed. The ginger curled her arms about herself, not again, she didn't want to have to...not again.

The voice had sounded rough so she guessed that meant they probably knew these guys. The green jewels met the dead eyed ones of her latest attackers.

"It wasn't my fault okay...we just have to finish scavenging and then we'll find a way out, think it was the dumbass on the horse." That one sounded nice and then there was a bit of overlapped voices of arguing which bit at Rose's ear drums it had been a long while since she heard that many people talk at once.

Shakily she stood, pressing herself in to the wall, Rose would need to hide or maybe she could just introduce herself. That went over well last time didn't it? The ginger scolded herself silently, still smelling of their blood before wiping her face on her sleeve.

"looks like someone was here before us. there's no bites on these fuckers..." her eyes shot up from her hiding place and the woman shrunk back between the wall and vending machine.

Fuck.

it was that voice again, the harsh southern one that had been shouting, Rose held the knife and glared at the redneck who appeared into her view. His eyes lock onto hers and a leering almost polite smile appeared on the man’s face.

"And they are still here-" The ginger jumped out at him shoving the man until he was against the wall and the knife was on his throat.

"Guys I need some help over-""Shut up! they will hear you." Rose snapped with wide eyes, the man smirked at her straining his neck upward as he swallowed. He was covered in light blond buzz cut hair which made him seem nearly bald, the fucker even dared to have an excited glint in his eyes.

"You just happened to miss that, that was the point sweetheart. " the woman growled and pressed the knife harder against his skin, annoying fucker.

"Not them, them." Her head tilted to the left as the walkers pounded against the door, any movement from him, she'd really fucking ruin this top. His brow raised and he shrugged gently before looking over Rose's shoulder.

"China town, are you going to shoot this bitch or what?" Her green eyes met with the somewhat familiar young man who held a gun up to her, his hands were shaking and the woman made sure to press her free arm against her leverages chest.

"Don't." Rose commanded in a whisper pressing the blade harder against the country mans throat, she knew it would take a bit more pressure to draw blood.

"Just shoot her Glenn, look what she did to those guys, look what she's doing to me, fucking shoot her." Rose glared at the loud mouth, eyes shifting to the door, before looking back at the man. She should kill the redneck just to get the walkers off their ass

"Put the knife down, we can talk this out." The small man in the baseball shirt seemed to be reasonable, but her eyes stayed locked on the man before her as she slowly stepped back, he didn't seem the type to enjoy being emasculated.

With in that moment to prove the ginger right, the southern trash mouth swung at Rose.

"You fucking rug muncher-" Rose twisted to the left and grabbed the arm he was going with before, twisting it behind him and clenching her jaw as her knee met his tense back and blade was back to the strangers throat.

"Back the fuck up." The man was pushed away and Rose set the knife on the ground hesitantly eyeing the two.

"Okay good, tell us why you killed them." The young man's voice was shaking as he spoke his hand shivered as well, he hadn't killed someone before.

Lucky, it had only been five months in this hell of a new world and here she was alright with killing people. The people behind the gun wielder looked clean, nice even, she didn't know how long they were actually going to last.

Rose was surprised they had lasted this long.

"They tried to rape me, I kind of thought it'd be okay to go at them, you think that it was wrong, go the fuck ahead and shoot me." Rose stated as she pulled up her sleeve to show them the hand shaped bruises.

The country man who had threatened her before, even glared at the bodies, before she turned about and took her bag from the hiding nook. Maybe he wasn't as bad as she had thought.

"that's a fair killing then, did you search them?" Shrugging the woman shook her head and broke open the vending machine with her knife to take out the snacks and stuff them in.

"You guys have the honors, do you know where the bathroom or baby section is? I need to clean up a bit.... I'm Rose by the way." The two looked at her slightly shocked by...well her, bruised, covered in blood, knife in hand and now all tension gone from her shoulders

"I'm Glen the man who's ass you rightly handed to him is Merle.... baby wipes are over there right past the jewelry section, we should probably be packing them too. " Awkward silence ensued though the redneck man had glared at his young friend. Rose smiled oddly bobbing her head as she walked past them.

"I'll go in a bit okay, it was nice to meet you al-""No I think you should stay with us, you know how to handle yourself it's a hard thing to find nowadays. " Merle had looked shocked at the boy's up frontness and her brows furrowed, Rose could only shook her head.

"I don't like groups...But i'll think about it" The girl stated with a slight shrug, before heading deeper into the store, only to pause and turn back to the redneck.

"Sorry for attacking you like that, thought you were with them."

With that small apology the blood soaked redhead ,continued till she got to where she was going. The baby wipes did wonders on her face, but her shirt was a lost cause without a proper place to wash it.

With an uncaring attitude the girl stuffed a few packages into the back pack and began to exit the baby section in search of something else to wear.

She stopped at the kids clothing area and picked up some shoes, jane should be able to fit into these, her eyes landed on a teens leather jacket and took that as well. Rose had been taking off her shirt when a voice caught her attention, it was a womans so though she grabbed her knife, the outsider didn't bother to cover herself.

"Don't stop on my account, I didn't mean to intrude, Glen told us you'd be here, he just went on a rescue mission." The woman was blond, pretty, with thick lips and bright eyes that made Rose set down the knife.

Though the survivor still kept her gaze locked on the stranger as she pulled on the red tank top and reached over for the long sleeve shirt that had caught her eye.

"You said us, i'm assuming Merle isn't the only one with you and the pizza guy." The blond chuckled and shook her head.

"I'm Andrea by the way, and no, thankfully not, we have a whole group back there, a few families, even got some kids we're waiting it out till we can get rescued." Rose rolled her eyes at that and swallowed down a small remark.

."The rest of us are making it to the roof, you can join us up there even if you're not staying, did you know Glenn from before by the way?" The outsider scoffed but thought on it, Jane would really like it there if they were telling the truth.

"No I just guessed- yeah I did he's the pizza guy, i'm human... so yeah I know him.." The blond let out a laugh and shrugged.

"I get what you mean, I miss pizza almost just as much as I miss sex." Rose sighed and leaned against the table feeling a hit of nostalgia, her and Jane used to take in pizza like it was air, halloween night they spent a shit ton of money on it calling the dominos five times. "I miss pizza more than sex, but I miss bubble baths most of all.."

"I'd like to join all of you but I have to go and get someone...it was nice to meet someone who wasn't trying to kill me..." Andrea let out a sigh, but nodded her head seeming to understand the woman's predicament.

"You're not going to make it passed the horde, you have any way to contact them?" Rose bobbed her head and pulled out her flare gun.

"Yeah, guess i'm going to need to go the roof then... mind leading the way." Ever so slowly the woman gave the ginger a smile.

"Yeah, I don't mind, just follow me." With a small sigh and two flares, Rose picked up the bag and headed upwards following the woman. The voices of the others made her nervous, Rose took in a breath before continuing up the stairs.

"So one flare and they'll come for us...think that's smart?" Rose rolled eyes shooting up one and following it again with another.

"What the hell you think you're doing woman you trying to attract more of them." her green eyes locked onto Merle's and she glared, huffing out a breath, was this fucker serious? "we're all the way up here, the walkers don't fucking care, I have someone who needs to know where I am, two flares mean's i'll go to them, third flares going up your ass if you're going to start nagging me okay....you guys may know your people are safe but I don't know mine is. "

Merle let out a sigh, almost apologizing to the ginger. "Sorry so is it a sibling, lover, or child?" The woman swallowed seeing the light sympathy she had gotten from the group.

"sibling." The rest of the group, mainly the young dark skinned woman and Andrea looked away in some shame or regret for her being caught up here. After a moment Rose was able to breathe eyeing the single flare that went up a number of blocks over.

"We'll make sure you live long enough to get to them, don't worry" the ginger smiled over at the man who had said it he was kind of large, curled hair and a kind smile, hesitantly Merle patted the woman's shoulder before heading off back down.

"No offense but as kind as your offer has been, i've been doing fine on my own."

"China town went down to go and rescue the dumbass, we should get some more supplies...Rose you can come on down and help if you want." It was Andrea who said this and the ginger didn't want to have to be sitting alone, so she followed, wondering if the Korean knew all of his friends called him Chinatown.

"you know if all goes well, we can help you get to them." Rose tensed at the suggestion and shook her head at the man. They may seem nice right now, but that could be all for show...that's what people did before, why would the world ending change that ?

"I'm t-dog by the way." the girl scoffed though her body didn't loosen up. "I think i'm good, made it here without any help...know where the duct tape is though?" his brows furrowed, though when they got to the lowest floor the man had managed to scrounge up a roll. The outsider sat at the cash register and took out the kids leather jacket.

"Why'd you need tape." Rose looked over him turning the sleeve inside out and smiled softly.

"Put tape about the inside of the sleeves, and even in the legs of your pants, walkers can't bite you, second armor kind of." T-dogs brows went up and he smirked. "That is the wackiest shit i've ever heard...it work?" Rose nodded tilting her head to her own jacket.

"Seems to have for me." There had been bites around the outside of the arms and shoulders, the man couldn't help but smirk.

"I'll be damned, next jacket i'll do just that...that sibling of yours, the jacket is for them right?" The woman nodded letting out a sigh, this small talk was really annoying her, even if it was the end of the world people still had to pretend to care..

"yup, I think you guys will be okay, even if I don't join y'all, I hope its true." Rose meant every word of it but the walkers at the doors made her swallow down her hopeful tone.

"If they can see us they're going to still be trying to get in, wanna help me cover the windows and blockaide the door just in case?"

He raised his brows. "What if we need to get out that way?" the woman shrugged her shoulders.

"Then we're screwed, but I think both of us got in not through the front door, we'll be fine."T-Dog shrugged and smirked as she held up the tape and pulled out some wrapping paper from beneath the counter.

"well it couldn't hurt to much." They had gotten halfway done when the others joined in, by the time they were finished, Glenn had radioed in and t dog ran off giving her a half hearted smile, leaving her to take out her jar of blood and line the doorway like a welcome mat.

Rose stuffed the remaining tape into the green bag and was thinking of what stupid ass question they'd go for with this one, when she heard a loud clanging. "I should shoot you right now, we're all dead because of you-""hey Andrea back off."

Though she feared the worse Rose stood there doing nothing, but awaiting the loud bang ,that thankfully never came. But soon enough all of the group plus the one newbie came in and they all seemed to eye the blood on her finger tips which the woman quickly wiped off before shrugging it off not wanting to come up with an excuse

Glen raised brow at the wrapping paper. "what the fuck..it christmas already?" T-dog adjusted his hat as he peeled back the paper. "Thought them not being able to see us would help a bit, but 'sheriff this is what we were fucking talking about. Ever geek for miles around heard you popping off your gun, you just rang the motha fucken dinner bell."

Rose eyed the newest member of the party and shoved the table against the doors fully thinking of coating the edges of it in blood too "I thought of it, probably ain't gonna help much since they can hear us-" Rose was cut off by the sound of a gun going off, her and just about everyone else rolled there eyes up to the roof but unlike them Rose didn't follow.

Instead she glared at the glass doors and took in a breath...Rose didn't know if she had enough flares to get Jane to understand how sorry she was for doing this one last run. They were supposed to leave that thought made her shake and Rose let out the breath, before shaking her head and heading upstairs to find the dumbass who made all of her work pointless.

"you should be polite to a man with a gun, it's only common sense." The ginger furrowed her brows seeing Merle chained to a pipe, T-dog on the floor with the others around him, and the new cop with a gun to the rednecks head.

It was her first time taking a good look at him, cute clean shave, though with the clenched jaw the girl could almost see him looking like a badass if he grew a bit of scruff...she really hoped he didn't shoot the idiot though.

"I feel like i'm missing something here." Andrea rolled her eyes and nodded her head as the man was being patted down.

"what are you gonna do? arrest me?' He was shouting at the newbie and the outsider sat next to him raising her brow unimpressed by the tough guy

"well merle, that's twice now...you want some ice to get rid of that burn? "Merle held a finger up and Rose unzipped her bag before pulling out a bottle of water and giving it to him, T dog raised a bleeding brow and pulling out some more stuff, she found a soda and tossed it over.

"really, you give me the water? Thought we were friends sweetheart. " She rolled her eyes at his sickly sweet voice

. "wow you're stupider than I thought Dixon." Merle curled his lips up and looked at the kid shoes his eyes softened and he clenched his jaw at the cop. "You better fucking come up with a way out you golden starred piece of shit, this girl got family to go to...and so do we all."

The cop glanced over and eyed the shoes before the woman rolled her eyes. Rose may have regretted not killing him or the cop not killing him at this point, she hated people at the moment.

"Shut up, I don't need your fucking looks.. and screw you merle, i'm glad I didn't give you a soda, that cop right there is getting my last fucking soda when he gets us out of this fucking mess." He managed to smack his lips after a long chug, and let out a small laugh as she muttered.

"get mad at me for shooting up a flare but there you are playing jason fucking borne, damned hypocritical cocksucker."

That promise to give Sheriff goodie the soda was taken back when he had them rubbing guts on themselves. "And one more thing.. he was an organ donor." Out of everyone, Rose was the only person who cracked a smile at that irony.

"You guys realize getting to know this dead guy isn't going to make this any fucking easier...I sure hope you never tell your kid about him, that's kind of fucked up. "

Rick clenched his jaw and picked up the axe ignoring the dark humored woman, only to have her stepped forward and stop him. "Gutting's going to be a better way, you get full intestin and if you're losing scent, you squeeze it to increase the smell." The others eyed her like she was nuts and the ginger shrugged her shoulders to kneel down next to the corpse.

" You've done this before." the cop stated obviously Rose's head bobbed and she saw her deceased friend instead of the man before her, her breath was held and turning away the dead man's crushed face and glazed gaze, she slid her dagger down his stomach.

Blood and the scent of liquified guts hit the woman as she pulled apart the skin with her gloved hands.

The smell was suffocating and slowly Rose pulled out the guts before slicing the things and finally standing to put them on the korean boy. who winced angrilly.

"Andrea get some vaseline small pocket of my bag-""why-"For the fucking smell put some under my nose and then pass it to everyone else, it helps trust me, the fuck you think i'm going to do, have sex with the deado?" Glenn didn't seem to think it did help to much, but T-dog managed to crack a morbid joke which caused the kid to lose his lunch, so Rose was going to take that as a win and just call the korean yellow bellied for now,.

"Once you guys get us out i'm gonna need to tuck in roll, so I call shotgun" Glenn shrugged and smiled at her looking entirely grossed out. "like we said you can stay if you want." Rose was really thinking about it they seemed nice. "you guys may want to take an umbrella." the woman had said knowing the unpredictable weather...of course she was ignored though..they so regretted that later.

Rose sat next to Merle as he looked over at T-dog , she nudged him with her root beer before smiling softly at his shocked face.

"Maybe save it for later..." he shrugged and took it, before coasting his eyes wantonly over the freckled woman. "Maybe I was wrong for asking blonde for a little booty time, you seem to be just as flirty as can be."

The ginger had hit him at that comment, and that had quickly changed his mind back to the woman being a rug muncher.

Moments after he had relabled the ginger as a lesbo, the radio sparked to life "Meet me in front of the store." Rose immediately stood at the radio noise, merle was still rubbing his jaw as everyone raced off. t

The woman had been halfway to the door, when the redneck's voice stopped her. "You can't leave me here like this, you guys can't do this!" T-dog looked at her and back to the hispanic man who was panicking.

"Man we got to go." Her head nodded in agreeance and she looked over at Merle, his eyes were wide and he nearly ripped off his wrist trying to get to them.

"Go unlock him now,we're not monsters, he's an asshole it's not a crime though. " T- dog growled and had been racing over so quickly that he accidentally had tripped just after slamming his bag into Rose's chest for her to hold. .

With in a moment despite the two men reaching for it, the key fell and went down a pipe, all the girl could do was watch in horror frozen to where she stood. "You did that on purpose-""It was an accident-""You did that on purpose." Rose stood eyes wide as T-Dog ran past her, her jaw was dropped and hands shook.

The fucking hell.. how had he just left the man here to die, fuck.

Merle stared up at her panicked to the point of tears pulling against the chain "Don't leave me.." His voice cracked and swallowing hatefully down all her instincts, the woman raced for the tool box.

As quickly as she could the ginger grabbed the hack saw before throwing down T-dogs bag next to the yowling man. Rose went to go and cut at the chain when she heard glass breaking from the first floor.

Despite this knowledge, or because of it, Merle still pulled at her arm blindly panicking as she began to pull away.

"Let go of me Damn you Merle, you have to let go, I have to get to Jane." her heart raced and she prayed that he'd let go or they wouldn't find the two. "Please." His voice cracked shakily once more and Rose eyed the door hearing the moaning coming nearer.

She wouldn't make it to them now anyways. "Okay I have to chain the door, let go I promise i'll be right back." Dixon held on tighter and moaning of the dead began to become unbearably close

"no you can't leave-""I'm not don't you fucking start with me, the walkers are coming." They were close and she could see them, the man evidently didn't let go, and in doing so he forced , Rose to unzip her jacket and herself away from the screaming redneck to the door.

Despite her sprinting all the way to the door, heart racing like a jack rabbit as she got the chain seeing the creatures hands and snapping teeth going towards her, Rose almost didn't make it...in a way she didn't

It was only a moment but one hesitant second cost her everything.

The lock closed and a hand ripped at her forearm pulling it towards its mouth, the ginger was only able to pull back, a moment to late. whatever relief could have been caught died right there, her jaw dropped and the girl screamed into her fist eyeing the walker who had ended her, the woman's flesh still hung from his teeth.

her breath was heavy as an aching pain went through her arm, blood gushed out towards the undead egging them on, and Merle was sobbing at the sight.of it "oh god...oh god..i'm sorry..i'm sorry. " Rose ran her fingers through her hair panicky looking at the wounded arm, she was dead..she was going to die.

It seemed as though Rose had gone to step two of grief, anger. It boiled inside her she didn't even try to stop herself from feeling it

"You fucker, you fucker." Her eyes went to him fury filled with tears running down her face, Rose marched over at Merle and kicked him as hard as she could repeatedly.

The woman was growling like the undead she would turn into as Dixon sat there and took it without fighting, looking at her taped lined jacket in horror.

He deserved the pain, he deserved it and so much more than that for killing the only person who had stayed behind for him.

After a few minutes of rib bruising kicks, Rose collapsed next to him sobbing panickedly as she reverted back to sadness and tried to figure out what to do next.

Her mind was racing with a billion different thoughts before the woman focused and nodded her head with realization. Rose was already dead and it'd be okay, Jane would be okay...if and only if..oh god, she really didn't want to have to do this.

At the moment Rose wanted to kill him, she wanted him to suffer a slow painful agony induced death, but she also wanted, almost more than anything, her sister to be okay.

After letting out a breath the girl spoke."Okay...-" Only for Merle to interrupt her with a blubbering plea.

"i'm sorry I didn't know, I should have believed you." Merle was looking at her, sincerely sorry that he had caused her to get infected and Rose was pissed that he could pull a drop of guilt from her.

"Shut up...shut up...I know...I wouldn't have believed me either, i'm not going to unchain you-" Merle launched at the woman and grabbed her throat the drop of guilt suddenly drying up, Rose kicked Dixon in the stomach out of instinct and crawled back glaring at him as he doubled over in pain.

"I'm not going to unchain you...until you promise to take care of my sister, I know you're going to want to kill me, but I fucking stayed I don't even know you and I stayed....and now i'm a dead woman, you understand...if you don't fucking swear...i'm just going to let this thing take me and i'm going to fucking kill you anyways."

Merle swallowed pulling back once more as he nodded...he thought of it and swallowed.

"i'm not good with kids-"" and i'm not good with dying! Do you fucking see me complaining?! My sister is a child. I would leave you here right now and get her myself, but i'm dying and if I turned and she was on her own ...i'm not dealing with that, Jane can make it on her own for a few fucking days but..." Rose shook her head glaring at the man with tears going down her face.

She was to tired and angry to deal with him, her knees felt weak and the ginger sat down tying the wound with a spare shirt she had pocketed from earlier.

Rose wanted to rest, she wanted to be somewhere else, home with her sister tucked under her arm while they binge watched movies, but here the girl was, on a rooftop, never to see the light of day, never to see her sister again, with a withdrawing drug addict, who had gotten her bit.

"Please...just promise....i'm going to let you go anyways, I know you're probably going to throw me off the roof...but.." Merle sighed and looked at the bite, it was ugly, bleeding, and it was all his fault.

" Can't throw ya' off the roof, then I wouldn't know where to go and get' your sister." Rose took in a thankful breath and nodded her head as she went to kneel down next to him.

"I have a few hours left at the most...lets see if the hacksaw can work, if not..." His brow raised and he watched her swallow with eyes widening in some worry.

"we'll have to cut it off...I know it's not the best idea, so let's hope this will work.." She had started on the chain giving him the knife so he could try and go for the lock.

Rose paused and let out a breath. "If I turn....No When I turn, you kill me...I don't want her seeing me like that, you don't have to bury me..just don't make her do it, she had to kill our mom...had to stop her from killing me." Merle stopped what he was doing, keeping the chain stiff as he nodded his head.

" I will, don't worry..what if you die before we get there.." Rose pulled out a photo and shoved it to him.

"If I die before I make it to her, show Jane this and tell her rosie went to see the concert and that I saved her a ticket, otherwise, she'd shoot you..." Merle looked at the picture of the girl who looked just like her sister. With the same eyes and hair as Rose continued with the chain, it wasn't working so far. Sighing the woman panickedly went to the tool box. and clenched her jaw.

"Ain't none of this shit going to help!" Rose tried the hammer to pull off the bar from the pipe before looking towards him with a knowing look, she would get to cause him pain after all.

"No, no,no,no let's try again-""No we can't, I don't have time remember" The ginger spat angrily, and though Merle really wanted to argue, he instead shakily took in a breath...he was just postponing it.

"God damn it, this was my favorite hand." The sweated woman rolled her eyes and bobbed her head, trying to remember what they were supposed to do so he wouldn't bleed out.

"Okay, tie your belt around your wrist, bite on the end of the belt so you don't bite your tongue off.... let me see." the man did as she said and he pulled at it before she looked into her bag.

"I have alcohol, not the drinking kind i'm afraid...but here, take two, it'll help." Rose held out two pills, the sweated Dixon bobbed his head and took them dry swallowing, the medicine before downing the rest of the woman's water.

"Okay let's do it." Rose opened up t-Dogs bag and pulled out a shirt.

"This isn't going to feel good, don't scream...and I know you're going to want to, but don't kill me till i've turned..what are you gonna do when it's just you and my sister?" Rose asked dampening part of the shirt with the bottle of alcohol before doing the same with her dirty knife and cleaning it.

Merle furrowed his brow shrugging as he held the end of the belt.

"I donna, go to camp have lori take care of her-" Rose's glare silenced him. "you sure that's the best idea?" The man Sucked in a breath and nodded. "You don't want me to raise no girl." Merle whispered before biting into the belt.

The ginger shakily swallowed and squeezed the hand he was about to lose before putting the blade on it to get away the skin and muscle, it'd make the wound as clean as possible, before going for bone. His face went red and the man started to pull back against the chain even harder as crimson came out over the girl and the hot floor . Dixon almost passed out swaying at the wounded wrist as she cut away the bone.

It wasn't as hard as she thought it would be, and if Rose was being honest, Merle took it like a champ, not that she would tell him that. Though that did not include, when it did come off and Rose had to straddle him and pin his other arm to the ground to avoid him punching her as she placed the cloth on the stump.For good measure the woman tightened the belt on the cloth to lesson the blood loss and keep the wound clean.

"It's okay.....its over, Merle, stay awake,I don't have time for this, look at me." With his jaw clenched and gaze wavering, he stared up at the paling woman with the bleeding arm and concerned gaze.

"Two more pills and i'll be okay." Rose's hands shook and she moved back eyeing the blood, gosh she really was hating the color red at the moment.

"It's not to bad, i'm giving you one more, you need to be able to take care of her and kill walkers." Her eyes had tears in them as she numbly said this and Rose quickly gave him another pill eyeing the unopened can.

With some shakiness he took it, eying his detached limb for a moment of mourning after it was over and the pain seemingly lessoned the man nodded.

"I'm okay, help me up." The woman did and slipped T-dogs bag on to him careful to not touch the stub.

"Can you walk?" Merle leaned down and picked up the can before moving forward and holding it out to her, his breath becoming unsteady just from the action. "Yeah I can...take it and put it in the bag, lets go...this way." The woman swallowed and nodded her head.

No matter how pale he was, she still eyed him oddly waiting for him to attack, Dixon didn't and shakily the girl handed him her knife and let him lean on her as she led them away from the walkers. Rose and the redneck made their way down the other building, after stumbling through a few floors two walkers were seen and the ginger held her finger to her lips.

The man looked at the knife to give it back, but the ginger held up the wrench and scoffed slightly, before going after them. Merle felt a small mourning as he watched her. She didn't even hesitate, like she was born for this.

Rose really did know how to take care of herself, she probably would have lived through all the way to the end, but because of the man, and him not trusting her.. Rose's sister was going to be alone...or worse stuck with him.

Merle eyed the knife and looked at the young woman before him, Merle could end it right now, and he really wanted to, but she turned towards him eyes wide in worry.

"duck." without question the man did and suddenly a thud was heard, Merle looked over his shoulder to see a geek not even a foot away from him dead on the ground.

"There's a kitchen, we need to cauterize the wound." Kind of in awe he nodded watching the ginger eye the knife in his hand carefully as though she knew what he was thinking before shooting him a look.

"Alright, lead the way." they had catering tools, but the stove didn't work so they made due with the fire starters, he bit the leather belt and Rose had filled him with two or three shots of hidden away alcohol before burning the flesh and re wrapping it.

"Still not killing me?" Merle looked over her, he himself ways swaying and had blacked out for ten minutes, before Rose slapped him awake, she looked paler and it had been two or three hours since the bite..but besides that and a slight slik sweat, she looked alright. "Nope, not yet." he shrugged and let out a breath, before taking hold of the stove's edge and leaning up. "well...which way to Jane?"

Rose could have almost cried as she led him to the window smashing it open with a nearby lamp. "let's get to the roof, i'll shoot up a flare, see if she'd even there..." Merle wanted to do nothing else, but pass out ,his legs shook and sweat nearly blinded him, instead he nodded and followed shakily up the fire escape. Rose shot and they waited a good twenty minutes before seeing the bright yellow flare.

"It's only one...she's safe, if it was a green one we'd need to really hurry for her." Dixon sighed, it wasn't to far, his eyes went to Rose, her body shook and the man knew she was crying.

"i'm sorry..." Merle muttered softly squeezing her slightly to his side. "I know, it'll be okay...jane she has and allergy to blueberries..other ones are alright but not those..she's a good shot, slingshot way better than gun but she can handle her own...her gutting needs improvement."

The woman was muttering her fingers went through her hair and tiredly the ginger shot him a look as though something had just came to her.

"you're gonna have to take care of her dog...betsy...stupidest shit dog,I was going to kill him before we left atlanta for good and headed to canada...but you're going to be fucking stuck with it." Rose stated this before letting out a laugh, merle joined the dying woman rolling his eyes.

"Knew there'd be shit i'd regret about this, what kind of dog?" Her eyes met his as she stood once more and held out her hand. "chocolate lab..she's really stupid, but she hunts, and only barks when she sense something's wrong, also she'll protect Jane till the last,I hated that dog."

The man forced himself to stand and Rose placed his nub over his shoulder "Don't see why, seems to have loved her." The infected woman tilted her head, looking over him.

"loyal as hell but never got the concept of house training,I don't have anything but that against it." Merle let out a sigh.

"Yup, i'm gonna have to kill it." One more smile was shared before they went on their way.

It was going alright, despite the fact that they knew Rose was going to die, Jane would be okay.

Another hour passed then she stumbled and for the first time Merle had to help her walk. She was shaking and her stomach twisted, a damp sweat covered her head, making it seem as though Rose had gone for a swim and her skin was white. it was dark by now, late in the night.

He helped her walk until the girl pushed him away and stumbled to the wall to bend over herself and start to cough. Rose knew it would happen soon, there wasn't blood but there would be soon. Merle took in a breath and gently rubbed her back easing the beautiful dying woman.

"Take in a breath, you good?"Wincing silently as her body rattle, she nodded.

"Yeah...when the blood comes up...i'm going to be hallucinating...the building we're at has a blue mustang in front of it, go through the side entrance." Dixon smiled slightly letting her arm go over his shoulder.

The man really wasn't a good person, but he felt sorry for her, Rose was nice to him...even though he was an asshole, even though she was going to die because of him, she was still nice.

It was a few hours later almost day time..they were both exhausted, Rose was wincing at every step, two hours before the woman had started to cough of up blood, just a bit though she made the man keep her distance just in case.

By the third building they had gotten to, just four blocks away from where they had to be, the ginger spoke.

"I can't walk any further....sorry"

Blood dribbled from her lips and her eyes had blood vessels which had popped causing her to look even more shaken up and near to death.

Merle nodded and looked about the room they were in, with his nub, and only working hand he hitched the girl up bridal style and carried her to the couch.

Rose winced and rolled her eyes as the man smirked with a suggestive brow raise. "Shut up....it's kind of a pity...don't have time for that suga..."

He scoffed setting the woman down as gently as he could, though a small blush had managed to go up her paper white cheeks. "Fine....now what I wait?" The ginger shook her head and winced as she cleared her throat .

"No...you listen." Merle sat on the arm and helped Rose slip off the bag so she could lay back comfortably.

"There are different colored flares..blue, means uh, i'm on my way,I need you to shoot that one after...i'm gone.... so she'll have her shit packed, green is get to the second building, don't use that one you don't know where is is at."

Her breath was soft eyes almost shut as she wheezed out the sentence. "Yellow...is run..you use that i'll fucking bite you right now." Merle managed a smile as he nodded his head.

"Repeat it." Rose growled, his brows furrowed. 'what-""repeat it, what's blue." Dixon had no idea what to do so he stared at her. "Repeat it you fucker...i need you to fucking say it, you're gonna memorize this shit or i'll kill you right now."

"Alright say it again." Rose smiled and did grouchily.

"Blue i'm on my way, yellow is run, her birthday is may third..the dog is on the fifteenth..don't talk about our parents..,do not mention our father if anything.." The girl whispered clenching her jaw while she hissed out her next sentence. "..he was a sick son of a bitch, her dog is named betsy but Jane will always call her burns." A small smile.

"I don't know why... call it Betsey when you need to get over you, don't put a bag on it." Rose nodded her head and took in a breath letting out a laugh at some memory he'd never get to laugh over with her.

"..She has night terrors too, don't touch her..she's okay with me..but you'll have to crack a glow stick and make sure she sees...that you're not him..or who ever is take care of her...gotta keep her quiet..squeeze her hand three times, and humm...jane likes to be held when it happens..if she's okay with them then do..it."

"She's allergic to blueberries. Repeat it." Merle looked at her, the body seized and shivered her eyes met his demandingly with tears. "Blue i'm on my way, yellow run..may third for her, not dealing with the dog, no parent talk, don't touch her when she's screaming, glow stick first, three hand squeeze, hum and hold her. No blueberries." Her eyes watered and shakily she nodded her head.

"Again."

He did and at the end of it she squeezed his hand...Rose wasn't looking at him her eyes watched past him and she clenched her jaw.

"you can do it now....if you want...i don't want to hold you up." Merle shook his head almost crying himself, he couldn't do it..he didn't want to, a fucking kid...how could he even look at her after what he had done.

"What's her favorite color....favorite book...she left handed or right handed? does she even know how to read...i need to know these things" Rose whimpered and softly smiled as he cleared away hair from her face, gosh she didn't want to go...and she didn't hate him.

Rose wanted to, but she couldn't.

"I can't...i can't i'm seeing stuff...you're gonna have to find out on your own.....she likes coraline..i have a copy of it in my bag..if you want you can read it to her." Rose had let out a laugh shaking her head at how pathetic this all was dying for some fucking stranger, they looked at one another as the man stroked his thumb over her cheek. Soft, gentle, everything he wasn’t it was a kindness taking away her tears as Rose tried to stay strong

"repeat it" Merle eyed the knife in her pocket poked out, he let go of her cheek and took it from Rose breathing softly at the realization. "Blue..it's blue isn't it? " the ginger nodded and beamed as he remembered the blue boots she had gotten from the store.

"yeah...she would always try to eat them...just because they were fucking blue" The man sighed and looked over her, he would have really liked Rose, in the before, he would have probably made her get a restraining order on his ass.

"what do I tell her again? " Merle asked gently trying to stall for another moment.

Her green dulling eyes met his as she stroked his cheek almost seeing someone else as she spoke hoarsely.

"rosie's gone to the concert, she's saved you a ticket for the show.." Her hand fell suddenly and body shook on the dirty couch in sorrow and pain as she coughed up more blood

"Alright, i'll be sure to tell her...." Merle softly whispered pulling her head to his chest ignoring the blood that seeped through onto his shirt. Rose found herself holding him tightly , she shivered against him, bone’s nearly rattling...she was scared.

After all she had gone through to protect Jane, losing everyone, losing everything, this was it. Her fist clenched tightly and Rose let out a breath. The life slipping from her as he ran his hand through her hair.

"I am sorry though red." The woman nodded inhaling the man's comforting scent, the last thing she would ever smell, him, a stranger being the last one to hold her.

Rose couldn’t think of the last thing she had said to Jane before leaving, but she doubted it had been profound.

"I know-" There was a soft sound, bit of pain and then it ended, her hands fell and eyes saw nothing. Dixon let out a breath and placed Rose back on the couch, the man really hated himself right now.

Tears went down his face and tiredly with aching arm and guilt in his chest, the man moved away from her to the window, he couldn't breathe.

He was alone, supposed to take a kid who would undoubtedly hate him, to his group. A group who would see him as the coward despite them being the ones who left him behind.

Merle took Rose's bag and he began to leave only to race bak and angrily glare down at her corpse, pale and perfect. Perfect despite the crimson on her lips and dirt on her hands, despite the dullness of her eyes, perfect.

"fuck, this ain't right, ain't no kid allowed to rely on me fuck...fuck....i better be going to heaven for this shit" Merle closed the dead woman's eyes, looking over her he took the only thing he thought the girl could want.

It was a necklace, the back part of the chain was crimsoned from his last and only kind act, but without another thought, Merle took out the flare gun from the bag before ramming in the blue bullet and heading out. He could feel her hand on his and wondered what sick god up there was laughing at him

the Flare lit up the sky and he wiped away his tears as he continued on his journey.


	2. Chapter Two: The Brand New Day And  Cryptic Night

Jane waited on the third floor of the dusted up building, she had gotten a lot of flares today..yesterday actually. As it was morning and _ a brand new day _ , a day that marked the last day they’d be here in this city. 

Maybe something had happen, but it was still her sister’s message. She used their colors and the regular numbers, maybe Rose had just found someone and that was taking her a bit longer...that'd be nice. 

Jane hoped they had their own car though, it was crowded as it was with just them three.

The sun had risen almost fully and despite the end of the world, the girl found herself enjoying the sunrise. It wasn't to long after the thoughts, of what they could get rid of to make room for the possible stranger, had disappeared that a familiar blue light came up. 

The young teen smiled brightly at the sight of it. Her sister would be here soon. She had only gotten a few hours of sleep, but knowing they'd be on the move again, perked Jane up a bit, she's be able to sleep in the car. 

That thought made the girl smile as she began to pack up her books and knives. 

The flare was really close, so in her hurry, Jane shoved the pup off of her lap after the items in arms reach were shoveled into the duffle. The teen filled with anxious excitement raced to pick up their other bags.

There was just two more  of them and Jane could carry them alright without much effort, not for to long though a few blocks, a mile at the most. 

Thankfully, the other bags were in the car, It was great that it was a cool morning and their car wasn't to far away. Not to mention that there were less walkers, then before. 

In the small amount of time she was separated from her sister, Jane discovered that part of her actually really liked this. Not the end of the world but,  spending time with her sister, looking for items to continue on their quest north, it was almost like an adventure book.

Another deeper part of the child just wanted to go back to school, to sleeping in at the booths while Rose worked, waking up to cold fries and a melting milkshake, eating them in breaths, before having to set off to walk to the apartment. 

She wanted it not only for the simplicity of everything, but for the fact that Jane knew a bunch, millions even, of people had died. People, she had known, kids even, almost everyone in the world. 

The girl, despite the way that she found a sick sort of freedom from all of this,  wanted things to be like they were. Ignoring these thoughts and focusing on the situation before her, Jane tied up her hair into a loss bun  and sighed as the dog next to her whined.

She wanted to start whining to, worry was brimming over. When Jane had went to sleep, there had been a horde of walkers about three blocks north. The newest flare came from four over, that put a huge impossible  block of what if between the young teen and her sister. 

Jane kept the gun on her belt loop and awaited the welcomed sight of her sister. She knew, Rose would find a way around them, she knew it wouldn't be long, not unless something had happened....

Jane tucked in her shirt and fumbled from one foot to the next. Nothing happened, Rose would be there with the last hawl they had to take and they’d leave. Nothing happened.

The girl calms her nerves by petting Burns as the dog began to whimper, that worried her, she was usually so calm, whimpering meant danger.  Jane’s own uncertain thoughts made her head ache and stomach churn, but instead of crying, it came out as anger towards her pet.

Rose had taught her anger was always better then tears, you could wield anger, sorrow would get you nowhere though.

"Shut up honey..it's alright." It’s diaspore colored eyes met her gaze and the pet tilted it's head as though confused. Jane knew she shouldn’t have been angry to Burns at the least.

Rose had been gone all day yesterday, this was their last day in the city before they were moving on to going north, nothin could happened to either of them. With everything else that had happened, that just wouldn't be fair, even knowing that, she worried.

Brighter thoughts filled her head.

Hell, even if the sisters had gotten into trouble, no one could kill Rose, no one but Rose. Not because she was tough as shit, the girl just knew her sister was just stubborn that way, ain't nothing that could have been done about it.

Stubborn in everything, each decision they made, or rather Rose made, was an indisputable decision.

About two weeks ago, they had decided on heading north, there was nothing to change her sister’s mind.  Rose said it was because the zombies wouldn't be able to move as fast or as much, with the cold affecting their muscles as it would. 

Jane knew her sister was probably just saying that, but it made her feel better... no matter the falsehood of it.

A small noise met her ears breaking her from her thoughts and the girl pressed herself to the wall pulling out her pocket knife as Betsy's ears went down and a growl left her.

That wasn't a good sign and Jane hoped the creatures hadn't heard the dog as she pulled out her knife and steadied her hands.

A small moment passed and nothing came of the sound.

The air shifted causing Betsy to sniff, perk up, and race out. It had to be Rose, the girl began to smile brightly before hopping out of her hiding spot and seeing the stranger. 

That was not her sister. 

Jane pointed her gun at the one handed man, before a breath could be taken  her eyes turned to slits, as she panically called her dog back to her side.

"Betsy here now." The chocolate pup whined and raced to her, away from the bald tough looking stranger. The girl immediately noticed Rose's bag and her body tensed, oh no. Why would he have that...unless

"Thought you called her Burns?" The kids brows furrowed and she clenched her jaw, with fear pulsating through her. Who the fuck was this guy...Jane hadn't known him from before, and Jane didn't see him to be the kind of guy Rose would talk to. ..but he knew about Burns, the girl could be wrong.

"Where is she." He sucked his lip in and shook his head. The moment Merle had seen her, he knew couldn't do this..the girl looked thin, defensive, tired, on the verge of breaking him already. 

The man really didn't want to risk her shooting at him, or her crying...Merle didn't know which would be worse

"She got...she got caught up with my group, they couldn't get here to get you, and she dropped her bag...told me where to get you, gave me your picture so you'd trust me."

The girl didn't change positions and Jane, instead, held the gun up tightly with both hands now, nudging her head to the strange redneck who she watched under a scope.

"Show it to me." Merle smirked shaking his head as he nudged off the dead woman's bag and pulled it out. This girl was most definitely Rose's sister, same battle stance, steady hands. 

Her eyes went over him and the picture, Jane nodded slightly almost untensing before him.

"What'd she say to tell me..." He knew the code to tell her that she was dead but anything else and the man was at a loss. 

"We got separated doll, all Rose told me was that her sister needed her, we didn't really have time for the secret codes, okay, if i'm being honest the only reason she ain't here is because, she got shot.

Her brows furrowed and Jane swallowed shakily, the kid started seeing the worse flashes of Rose bleeding out dying slowly surrounded by strangers. 

Alone.

"Really...is she okay?" Merle took in a breath and swallowed nodding her head, gosh why'd he'd feel so guilty about lying to her. "Yeah, she'll be fine it was a flesh wound...but i thought it'd be for the best to not have her risk it..my group will take care of her."

Janes eyes went down the street and then to the one armed man, her body relaxed though the weapon stayed stayed on him as he picked up he bag and stuffed the picture into his pocket

"Sou able to drive with out that hand? " The man managed to smirk shrugging, he'd have the fucking others explain it to her when he got there.

She'd hate him for it, but it'd be best the kid hated him when they had the group..him and Daryl had been planning on leaving anyways soon enough...sooner now.

Merle wouldn’t be able to stay there with the kid trying to kill him. 

"Only one way to find out, go get the bags and show me the way to car." She put the gun down and glared at the man before shakily nodding her head. "I swear to god, try anything i'll gut you..." Dixon's hands- well hand and nub- went up and he chuckled at the young spit fire.

Part of him wondered if he'd have to worry about Jane slitting his throat in the middle of the night after she found out. Merle couldn't blame the kid if she did. 

The girl appeared moments later, green sharp eyes like her sister went over him as she pulled at her bags straps, his gaze averted slightly at the contact as though she could see his guilt beneath the gleam of his eyes..

"You know, look like an asshole, but i'd still hate to kill you...i’ll ask you not to make me, come on." With that small threat the girl shrugged and Dixon looked over her, Merle even managed a real smile at the small child.

Definitely was related to Rose, kind of reminded the man of himself or Daryl when they were kids.

"You sure do have a mouth on you." The girl stopped and furrowed her brows as she look over her shoulder. "So do you..." Merle thought the kid was talking about his cussing, and was backtracking what he had said to her, before the girl started up again.

"So does Burns...even they have mouths on them, don't see why you actin like it's something special" Janes chin went up a bit as a gesture and her eyes flickered past him.

Dixon looked over his shoulder, to see some scattered walkers and had turned back to tell the child to hurry up and head off, but she already was halfway across the parking lot with the dumb ass dog strutting behind her.

The tattered flannel the girl adorned reminded him of the jacket he had seen in Rose's bag as he had been fumbling to find the damned blue bullet to shoot up at midday.

"You didn't tell me yah name." Jane stated as she grunted with the door handle to the back seat of their rusted blue ford. Merle looked over the ginger kid, who, though had tucked away the only firearm into her belt, still had her eyes tensely locked on him as she loaded up the bags.

"You diden ask missy-""then i'll guess i won't know, i ain't that curious about you." The kid stated snappily at the pet name Merle had used.

Her eyes went to the rabbit foot adorning key chain before going to the tall stranger with a quirk on her lips. "What's the chances of you catching this if i throw em at you?" Dixon glanced down half expecting his hand to be there, it was just for a moment, but with a tired smile the man chuckled.

"well i used to be real good about that reflex thing...guess now it's fifty fifty...Merle's the name by the way."Jane let out a light laugh and eyed the keys again, before simply pulling open the driver door and walking towards him.

Without eye contact or any hostel intentions, the girl took her sisters bag from him and replaced it with the car keys. "Set ya bag in the back with Betsy, she ain't gonna bite to hard. "

The kid shot him one more smile and settled herself into the passenger side of the car. Merle stood there for a good few moments feeling the picture and necklace in his pocket start to burn into his thigh, if Jane wanted to slice his throat open...Dixon had half the mind to just let her.

\-----

They drove on the empty highway for maybe an hour with him tapping his fingers on the steering wheel, and the doe eyed girl looking over his nonexistent hand, with curiosity. 

Merle was getting a headache from the stale air, discomfort in his stomach, and the lack of sleep catching up to him.

"Yah know, your sister left you a brand knew jacket in there..it’s leather." Jane's eyes left his nub for the first time and quickly she ripped the jacket out of the bag and let a small scoff leave her.

"she did it again." Out of the corner of Merle's eyes he could see familiar silver wrapped along the inner sleeves. "Did what?" the Dixon barked out acting none the wiser, shaking her head Jane pulled on the well fitting coat before deciding to answer. "Duct tape, puts it along the linings so we ain't get bit..." Her brows furrowed and she finally puffed up the courage to ask.

"Who shot her?" Merle blinked heavily at the question and the sting of guilt, beginning to see doubles as the kid yawned. 

"Didn't catch their names..." His voice was hoarse and exhausted, though he had been leaning his head out the window, that seems to have lost its ability to keep the man awake.

The car swerved slightly and Jane quickly straightened out the wheel eyeing him warily with a hint of anger behind her eyes.

"Ain't infected, don't worry about ol' merl here...just tired...I know you're anxious to get to camp...but i ain't slept in...well it's nearing the third day now.." With a small sigh she nodded her head and shakily suggesting that they’d bother do with some rest. 

Once the car was safely pulled over Jane pulled out the gun, it was at her side, but the kid’s body tensed as she looked Merle over.

"What did happen to your hand? You get bit?" The redneck eyed the kid and the gun warily, he had been just about to lean back the seat a bit when she spoke and now was stuck mid movement 

"You think your sister woulda trusted you with someone who got bit." Unblinkingly the ginger kid shook her head gun still at her side.

"Then why you being all paranoid, i'd unwrap it but i ain't got shit to prove to you little girl so you best put the gun down." Dixon hadn't meant to snap and almost felt bad for doing so, before seeing the girl give him a shit eating grin.

"it's my car asshole..." It was half heartly muttered and Dixon eyed the tough tiny shit with a small smirk of respect, before seeing the girl opened up the glove box to pull out a map.

"Kid we're parking-""it's for the windows gotta cover them just in case..." With that sentence unfinished he saw her staring at a lone corpse before opening the car door and standing up to wet the windows with a warm water bottle. 

"Got any napkins for the side windows?"

Jane smirked at the man handing him the bottle of water. "wet the other side of the front window." The redneck rolled his eyes but nevertheless did as he was asked

\---

Merle awoke due to  a lone whine that came from the inside of the car rather than the dead outside. "Shut up Betsy." The man growled half yawning before, it stopped and some muttering took its place. 

It sounded like Sophia, the hell was she doing here?  The man furrowed his brows and went to scratch his head before seeing the stub. Memories flooded him and he groaned silently at the ever fucked reality that dawned on him, before looking over to see Jane, sleeping with brows furrowed and trembling.

Night terrors, part of the Dixon just wanted to let her ride it out but as another sound met the guys ears, he knew that wouldn't be possible. 

From the walkers he could see peeking out from cracks in their napkin covering, Merle knew that there were to many for him.  Even if he had both his hands to handle them.

"No..no..da...stop.." Jane muttered body twitching as she flinched away from some unseen attacker. Pity and worry went over him as he watched her.

"NO...No..no." One of the deados paused in its step and Merle immediately went to shake her awake only for the dead girls voice to hit him. _ repeat it. _

He glared at the bag and angrily picked it up setting it in his lap as the creatures drew closer to the sound. The sun had began to fall and the glow stick cracked open illuminating the small enclosed car, before he tossed it on the girl and grabbed her hand. 

Jane's green eyes met his and they were wide and terrified for a moment before once again closing, her grip never loosened though.

"It's alright girlie, just sit tight....O'l Merle be making sure you're taken care of real good...you just sleep." While looking about the hellish world the man hummed wincing each time a walker bumped against them fearing they'd be smelled or the damned dog would wake up.

Dixon really wasn't a fan of killing domesticated animals, but for this one doing that would be even tougher.

Just because  what he did to her sister...he had forgotten Rose's jacket...Merle had forgotten in,his head went back onto the seat and the man clenched his jaw. 

Merle was pissed at himself, horribly pissed that he had been such an asshole, that he was stuck here. Merle really wanted to go out there and kill them all to take out his pent up rage.

But instead with a shaky breath and control Dixon didn’t know he had, the man pulled his hand from the kids and, despite wanting to down the pain pills in his pocket, Merle simply pulled out the photo of Rose.

He stared at the gingers freckled features and kind smile, even in the dull green light he could see the scarring of cigarette Burns on the older woman. Rose was wearing a sundress in this photo, and despite the wounds she looked beautiful. 

It wasn’t hard to figure out where she had gotten them, not with the kid next to him having nightmares, not knowing she would find out with in the day that she was living in a even worser one. 

_ You shouldn't have died for me Rose...i'm the last person who would be considered worth it, and it's all my fault..i'm grateful...but you shouldn't have had to have died for me.. _

The rest on the night Merle stared at that picture only to let it go to sooth the dog and hold Jane's hand when the mutterings came back. She ended up curling up to him which made him want to jump out and attack the creature outside just for one of them to end him, but once more he stayed there until he passed out deeply diving into his self loathing.

Merle shot up at the sound of someone grunting, half of the front map had been taken and his eyes widened at he saw the girl head stomping some walker. 

Another one came behind her and without thinking Merle jumped out of the car and screamed as it grabbed her. With in a small  jog, Merle was there and he kicked it away as its teeth sunk into her jacket.

The knife he had still sat on the dash and he panicking, Dixon tried to pull Jane back as she pulled out her flare gun and shot the creature, before it could charge.

The smell of burning flesh and odd burning sparks that flew out of it caused the two to stare as it fell down. Jane looked almost amused at the silver bullet like kill she had just done. 

"What the hell were you doing out there? You trying to get yourself killed? You  almost got bit," Jane shoved him off of her rolling her eyes at the adult, fucken red neck didn't know shit.

"I had to take the magazines and map off the window, and then i had to get these from the back," The girl at this time placed a orange bottle into his hand. 

"I didn't see them until they had already seen me." Her bark worsened as she finished her rant. "And as you can see, i fucken took care of it." Shoving past him and opening the back seat for Betsy,  Jane finished her rant. 

"You still should have woke me up." With one middle finger raised at the man Jane pulled out two cans of tuna and a loaf of bread.

"You hungry?" Merle sighed and nodded silently as he glared at the bottle, he couldn't open it, it'd be detox after a while... he really needed to get back to camp. Daryl would help out old Merle, more so when they left the bunch of squares that they were currently camping with.

"yeah..sounds like it'd be good, almost forgot in T's bag there is a soda, don't know if that a rare thing for you now day but you can have it." The girl gave him a small childish smile and giddily grabbed the bag, before pulling out the can.

She looked at it with wide eyes and beamed happily before biting her lips and offering him some, Merle’s stomach churned at the idea and he shook his head. 

"Thanks, you mind pouring some dog food for Burns, she'll try to eat the walkers otherwise...and that's just gross." His eyes went to the dog who simply chased its tale in response to the girls confession.

"Yeah you act all innocent, i know what yar are." Betsy barked at him with a small chipper sound and the Dixon rolled his eyes before going to the back of the truck where the dog food laid.

All the while watching the girl mix tuna and mayo with some pickle in a small bowl. She still looked like a kid right now. 

Jane looked down at what she was doing, feeling comfortable enough with the stranger not to have to watch him always. Mainly her comfort was felt since she hadn't been killed or hurt during their stop yesterday. 

They had stopped for a good...nine, ten hours so safe bet if he was going to kill her it'd wait until they got to camp..not that he looked like he could.

Rose would be okay, she had a flesh wound...maybe they'd stay with the group. That’d be nice, Jane’s eyes went to the pile up of cars on the other side and part of her wondered if they should check it out. 

The girl shook her head, he had one hand they had a single gun and using flares as bullets wasn't the best use of the commodity.

She closed up the bread and put the cans into the bag of them before turning to see Merle patting her dog lightly. He caught Jane’s gaze and gave the kid a small smile standing up and taking the quickly made food from her before settling himself up at the front seat. Maybe he wasn’t to bad

"Thanks kiddo. pity you ain't got alcohol, mind opening this...the pain pills as well." Rose would get pissed if she told him about the bottles and he wouldn’t be able to drive if she did. 

So the girl just shrugged opened the bottles from him and continued to eat her food. After she was done and enjoying her sips from the warm soda Jane's eyes lit up.

"You think sigourney weaver's made it this far?" He nearly choked on his water, but furrowed his brows at the girl as she closed up his pill bottles and stuffed them into the center console. 

"What kind of fucking question that?" Jane rolled her eyes shrugging with a put off air about her, thinking he was going to blow her off before he continued. "....of course she's fuckin making it, bitch did her own stunts on the alien movies, the fuck you thinking."

The ginger girl smirked at him and held up some knuckles. "Been dying to ask someone that, Rose said that she'd of died by now.." 

Merle gave her a sad gaze and touched knuckles with Jane before glancing at his nonexistent hand and feeling the dead woman give it a squeeze. "Well, Rose is a fucking idiot, lets go and get you to the camp."

They took another hour to get up to the cross way, Jane was excited but instead of babbling about it, mainly because she assumed the man wouldn't enjoy that, the girl took inventory of their latest run. 

"How old are you any how?" the man asked and Jane raised a brow snorting lightly.

"13 why you wanna get me a present?" The kid muttered not looking away from her notepad, as a thought went through her what if Merle was lying..

Jane's brows furrowed at the silence, before she looked up to see him give her a shrug. "Just wouldn't of guessed that, you're so damned tiny, Lori's got a kid your age, she'll probably be the one to take care of yah, carol's got a girl, and that beaner family they got a shit ton of little shi-""why would Lori be taking care of me?"

His eyes went to the road immediately and he gave her another small shrug. "yah know...jus' till your sis is betta. " Jane's body untensed and she nodded her head. 

That made sense her sister would need rest. Rose didn't need to be sitting up watching her all day.

"Her kid nice?" Merle rolled his eyes and scoffed. 

"Why yah think i'd know what kind of kiddo she got? yah lucky i remember the shits name....he whines a lot about his daddy that all i know."The girl let out a string of laughter looking down at the quarry as they made there way up the mountain side she really wanted to swim in that.

"Gosh, i'd feel bad for him but i don't like whiners...you got any youngans?" Dixon almost lost his shit at that question and Jane simply raised her brow and tilted her head awaiting the man’s answer. 

Not an inch of her felt like he’d of lost any of them if he had any, so there was no apology in her gaze

Merle’s own brow raised and finally he gave up. "No, i ain't got no kids, you soft in the head or something." The gingers brows furrowed and hesitantly she went to touch the top of her head just to check before his voice broke in. 

"What the shit." Jane looked over to the front only to see a taken apart car and body pile of walkers.

Her heart dropped and the car slowed...Merle almost started cursing up a storm, this wasn't how it was supposed to go down, damn he should have kept driving. 

"Where are they, Merle you said they'd be here, where's my sister?!" the kid screamed at him opening the car door and following him as he ripped something off the car and began to read it ignoring his small campaign.

Merle kicked the cinder block before half assedly putting the thing back on the window as he ran his hands through his blond scalp. 

"I don't fucking know." Dixon muttered taking out a breath, his limb was beginning to ache again and he hoped they would be there. Jane was to focused, seeing the blood on the ground and following the different splatters to the graves, she didn't notice him searching the car or calling to her.

All Jane noticed was that each grave had a cross, but none of them had a name on them.

_ What if one of them was Rose's _

The thought hit her suddenly and tears filled Jane's eyes, blindly the girl found herself digging at the dirt to one of the graves with her bare hands and nails, she had to know.

"The fuck?" His voice hit her and a moment later, since she didn't answer, Merle pulled the kid back and up by the scruff of her jacket away from the grave she was trying to disturb and looked over that kid like she was crazy.

"The fucking hell yah doing kid!?" her gaze moved behind him and quickly she launched passed him to the graves once more. Merle held the ginger back and winced as her nails dug into his forearm, he was thankful she hadn't tried for his stump. 

"Let me go, let me go, one of them could be hers, i gotta know-""It ain't, ain't none themes hers...." It came out as a bark instead of reassuring, but the girl stopped fighting nonetheless and looked up at him with teary eyed.

"How do you know that?" Dixon shrugged and swallowed hesitantly. He should tell her, it'd hurt more later.

"well, it would have been in the note, right? That's how i know. " Her brows furrowed and still holding her Merle continued. "They're on their way to the CDC..you wanna catch them up in time? or you want to ruin the resting place for them folks just in case?"

Jane sniffled down her fear eyeing him..the man's face was hardened and she didn't know if he was lying...but Rose being alive and not here..in the ground made her feel a hell of a lot better, so the girl would believe him.

"lets go.." The kid croaked and went to pull back when the man wrapped his arms around her oddly hugging the child with one hand.

"I know you're worrying...it'll be okay..." the odd hug gave the man a moment to swallow his own fear about his brother being dead, about how the kid would react. she stood there stiffly, before hugging the arm that he had held her back with and soon enough the Dixon took a step back.

"lets go and catch up with them." Jane nodded her head, looking over at the graves one more time before she moved back to the car, he stood there and eyed the group of graves. 

Fuck if his brother was in there..the thought made his fist shake but he shook his head, Daryl was too smart to go dying on him for a group of nobodies

he hoped T-dog was there though, the fucker was a coward running away like that, from him, Merle understood, but from Rose, that dead bitch had given him a soda and been kind to him, yet the man still left her there to die. 

After  hopping out of that sinful thought, Merle noticed, one of the had a necklace tied to the cross, no one in the group had worn that.

His brows furrowed but the man had remembered andrea grabbing it...damn that would have sucked if it was her..she had a nice ass. the thought went away and Merle managed a smile before its passing.

Jane was silent during the rest of the day, though the girl took up to writing down the names he had mentioned...and from the little information he had given her, she tried to think of what each of them looked like. with lori she thought of a nineteen fifties house mom, which made Carl one of those sweat vest wearing boys.

she went over the names and finally when the questions couldn't couldn't hold back and Jane had gone over each and every one of the members he told her about changing up their appearances again and again, the girl spoke to him. 

"so where were you guys originally planning on heading?" Merle shook his head nub aching angrily.

He wish he had his hand to open up the pain pills, but then again if the fucker still had his favorite hand, Merle would need the fucking pills. Hell Merle wouldn't be sitting her with little orphan annie worried out of his mind if his brother was alive or not, and feeling some pit filled guilt for the dumb bitch who had been the only one to stay behind and try to save him.

"We weren't, me and daryl were gonna leave the group in a few weeks, maybe less, them others just' wanted to sit tight and wait to be safe." Jane nodded her head.

"they're fucking idiots..." Merle happened to laugh at her for a moment before wiping his nub on his sweating head.

"while you're passing ol Merle here some pain pills you mind telling me why you think their such fucken idyats?" She shrugged her shoulders and pulled out his pain pills from his pocket before popping open the bottle. 

"The army was shooting people in the streets, expecting them to save any one is insane...therefore they're morons.."

The man dry swallowed the pill and made a noise while the girl buckled herself back in, end of the world and she was worried about getting into a car crash. 

Jane raised her brow and his eyes went to the belt before he smirked. "you're on pain pills jackass, ain't gonna risk that..i got shit to do.."

"you're a kid whatcha got to do." The man muttered amusingly. "get to my sister...the fuck you think we been doing here?" His smile fell and suddenly  the stinging in his wrist wasn't the worse pain.

  
  
  



	3. Chapter Three: The CDC

The two had been driving for a bit with her reading her book, silently oblivious to the mans worrying and only popping out of her worry world, when they had stopped .   
  
Jane watched him with brows furrowing, she couldn't see why they had stopped and though he took the knife with him, the girl still gripped the gun watching him haphazardly shoving the lone walker.

 

"You son of a bitch." just at the thing went to bite him Merle stabbed it. Ending its miserable nonexistent life.   
  
When the dead man had fallen, Dixon eyed the forest and Jane stepped along the graveled road with betsy sniffing the road till she found a place to do her business. 

 

The kid looked down at the dead man and sighed, Jane didn’t understand him and his odd way of acting.  "He just turned..maybe an hour or two ago...you okay...why'd we stop for him.." Merle rubbed the bridge of his nose shaking his head, what if they were dead.   
  
“He was from my group...i didn't even know him that well but..yah know I knew him...and if he got bit..." The man trailed off and scratched the back of his head. Merle couldn’t even bring himself to say it. 

 

"If he got bit...maybe the others did too..." Jane whispered this, speaking the words he could not and making them real. In panic the girl looked about the road for cars or other walkers, her heart was racing and hands shook.

 

This couldn’t have been it, her sister couldn’t have died alone with some strangers being around her as she took her last breath. Jane couldn’t be one of those creatures.   
  
"No...No....Girlie, let's got to the Cdc we'll see them there...come on." Jane  found some hope in his determined voice and she quickly sprinted towards the car.

 

"Besty, get in." The dog left the dead man's corpse be to race into its spot in the back. Merle almost went off without the girl shutting her door, in fact they had started to move when she did.   
  
His brother...Dixon couldn't lose his brother, it wasn't only that though, how could he take care of a kid.He couldn’t have done that before the apocalypse, and now, after the world ending, this was fucking impossible. 

 

Jane caught him looking at with some sadness her as they turned the corner and shot a glare at him, before rolling her eyes, adults were fucking weird as hell. 

 

His fucking brother was possibly dead, yet this cock sucker was trying to show her pity because her sister could be dead too. 

 

Merle had half the mind to just crash the car right here and kill them both, Merle couldn't raise this kid... not with him being who he was, not with what had happened with Rose.

 

Her death was on him, and The Dixon knew being responsible for Jane would end in just the same. He really didn’t think he could survive that.   
  
\---   
  
The doctor sat before the security cameras he had let them in and locked the upper doors. Edwin almost regretted it immediately. They had just a few more hours till the clock went down, but the air condition hadn't shut off yet so. The man had another hour before he had to deal with the group’s wrath.

 

His eyes caught movement, three figures, not walkers, but living survivors.   
  
It was a  girl, a dog, and a middle aged man, who was cursing up a storm as the child watched the camera's with a questioning gaze.  Just like the sheriff had, he couldn’t risk bringing in more people, not this close to the deadline.

 

"Vi, keep the cameras still." The robot responded politely with silence and the people outside began to talk.

 

_ “This is bull shit! they were supposed to be here, probably got chased off or some shit, we should go look for them.”  _ The girls gaze left the doctors machine and turned to the roughly built man in some concern.

 

The doctor  was proud that he had told the group to hide their cars in case of scavengers.  Otherwise these two stragglers would have had a hell of a time thinking that their people weren't in here.

 

It was better that they stayed away. 

 

_ “Where else could they have gone?”  _ The ginger girl asked angrily clenching her fist as she looked about the body covered ground.   _ "How the hell am I supposed to know-""You said Rose was with them you followed the note, have we seen another note?" _ __   
  
The doctor watched the two bickering back and forth before the girl glared up back into the camera. He knew the man wouldn’t listen to her, so they’d be alright

 

_ "Rose if you're in there, and those fuckers aren't letting us in, just tell them okay...just fucking tell them...." _ Her green eyes were wide and determined never mind the brute of a man beginning to pull her away. _ ‘“If you're fucking in there let us in.-"’’’'Jane stop we have to go." _ __   
  
The doctors jaw dropped slightly as he raised a brow...that wasn't right. There was a flicker of her pupils and the veins seemingly thickened as the one handed man began to drag her away.    
  
"Vi, zoom in to the girl's eyes." The camera did, there were no flecks in it, they almost looked glazed over as Jane glared at the camera, they changed back to normal almost instantly as she was pulled back.

 

The man tilted his head trying to figure out what he had just seen. Of course with the half bottle of wine running through him, that was difficult to do.

 

_ "Jane let's go and see if they left us a note...if they didn't I  _ -""That's my brother, the fuck doctor?! why are you just sitting there!? open the gosh damn door." the doctor was suddenly pulled back from his screen   
  
It was the country boy...Dixon...Daryl, yes that was the name.

 

Drunkenly Edwin blinked and raised a brow before speaking. The doctor must have been seeing things..he was hallucinating, to much of the drink had gotten to him.

 

"I told you they can't open..i didn't mean it lightly, we..the building don't work like that-"Daryl went to the ginger scientist and glared at him nearly hitting the man before eyeing the camera again. 

 

"God damn it, why's he with a kid, move the camera. " Edmund didn't move an inch and instead stared at the man bewildered, was he actually thinking the Doc had just sat here to change his mind now? 

 

The redneck grabbed him by his chin breathing heavily, with scotch scent air hitting the Doctor’s cheek, before angrily shoving him away.   
  
"Vi, move the damn camera. I'm not fucking done with you doctor, you're a sick man...i ain't buying all of this." With that and a string of cuss words the man left and raced to the elevators.

 

Part of the man wished Dixon would make it up there in time. It'd be a fucking shame if he couldn't save that poor girl from the horrors this new world held.   
  
\----   
  
Daryl did make it up to the first floor, only to see his one handed brother, the girl and her dog already halfway across the field. Their backs were towards him, breathing heavily the younger Dixon, slammed his fist into the window and started screaming. 

 

"Merle, fucking are you blind i'm right here. i'm here." The girl looked back and her head tilted, but after wiping her eyes and gazing over the walker banging on the window, she turned back.   
  
The other Dixon didn't even pause in step...The younger brother felt like he had abandoned the man who basically raised him. He had gone back and they had all gone back...they didn't find his brother, and then the attack had happened. 

 

Dread filled him, Daryl had thought the zombies were Merle's doing, that he had left him again but here his big brother was, with a fucking kid no less. The hell was that about?   
  
Shaking his head he rested upon the cool glass and saw the girl writing a note and sticking it on one of the abandoned cars. He'd worry about that later, right now that ginger prick downstairs has a shit ton of explaining to do. 

 

The fucker was the reason his only family was leaving him right now...fucking prick   
  
\---   
  
"We're going to fort benning?" Her brows furrowed huffing angrily at the man. They had looked for a few hours, Jane thought they should have looked more, despite the obvious signs that they weren’t here. The girl wanted them to stay, and not go on a wild goose chase

 

"Why the hell would they be going there, that's stupid, we should go and find some more supplies, and why was I the one to think up the note?..." That question was aimed at Merle, but as the girl rolled the words in her mouth. 

 

Jane asked herself, why hadn't Rose left a note, why hadn't she told them that there was a note meant to be left if she was too weak to write it herself?  

 

Hell maybe they didn't think to mention it in the map to the Cdc, that Rose was already dead, buried in that gravesite surrounded by strangers.   
  
"It's a place I remember Shane mentioning, they may have just got to the CDC but benning is the place they're shoot for trust me...." Dixon hadn’t really heard her question, he was lost in his head with the voices of worry. But he still tried to keep her calm with some conversation. 

 

It was already to late, Jane's confused look changed to realization  "....Now what's with that look girl?" The girl's head bobbed and she looked at him jaw clenching as tears appeared.   
  
Her lower lip was sucked in as she began to tremble her entire reality just shifted off track due to this realization. Her sister was dead. 

 

"Rose would have left a note, she was very detailed about our messaging system. She made the whole flare system, we even had cups with strings when we were searching houses in our old neighborhood...if they had gone there...and if she was with them...she would have made them leave a note." 

 

Merle's eyes softened and he nodded his head. Lying anymore wouldn't do him any good, not now  she had came up to her own conclusions and found her sorrowful way to the truth.

 

"Yeah. Suppose you're right."   
  
Jane held her knees to her chest chest rattling with hateful sadness and looked down at her feet, had Merle known? If not, why wasn't he reassuring her that her sister was alive and well, and instead was telling her that she was right. 

 

Dixon was an asshole, but he wasn’t that much of one, to make her think that there was hope...not when she knew it to be otherwise. 

 

"You knew...What did she tell you to say." Her fist clenched and voice shook. All Jane could do was silently pray, please don't say it, please don't say it until the words would come out. The chant in her head sounded as desperate as the hope for the cure was.   
  
At least if he didn't say it, there was a shit shake of hope that her sister was okay..or that this man was nothing close to who he said he was.    
  
"She said...Rosie went to the concert..and she saved you a ticket." His voice was grasped by unseen shock nearly completely taken away and the girl quivered her lips as her breath stopped. 

 

Jane could only stare down at the floor letting tears fall from her.  There was no hope, her sister was gone.

 

"What happened...How did she..." Merle closed his eyes letting out a breath as he turned slightly with his stump on the wheel and he pulled out the necklace he stole before tossing it on her.

 

He couldn’t look at her when she finally saw it.  With hand on the wheel and shaky gaze on the road he shook his head.

 

“It ain't gonna bring her back girlie-""Tell me how she fucking died or you'll check in the seat next to her." Jane had gone from being a blubbering curled up mess, frozen in shock, to a blubbering mess with her gun pointed at him.

 

Merle's eyes widened and he looked away from the road to the ginger kid trying to ease the situation.    
  
"Girlie, come on...we can talk about this later."  He drove around the broke down cars, eyeing Jane warily as she cocked the gun and glared at him. 

 

In her green eyes was a rage he didn't know kids could possess, but then again Jane had just lost her sister. Merle couldn’t imagine how’d he’d react if he lost Daryl, not now or god forbid when he was younger.

 

"For fuck sakes, she got bit....okay she got bit. Rose got bit and turned, her and I were on our way to you and she turned. " The girl swallowed slightly and  her eyes widened. No he was lying again, he had to be. Her sister wouldn’t have been so careless.   
  
"But..her jacket....her jacket should have stopped it.." The tears were a never ending stream down her reddening face, the girls lower lip couldn’t stop trembling.

 

"It was my fault... lost my hand because I was chained up. They left me up there...my group did….” But Rose didn't, of course she didn't Jane knew it before he continued to talk. 

 

“she...your sister didn't know me and she stayed to help. I freaked out and didn't let her go, because I thought she would...I didn't let her go, so Rose took off her jacket to be able  to chain the door so we wouldn't die and she got bit." Merle stated in a soft whisper looking at her expecting her to shoot him.   
  
His foot even let off the gas, slowing the car to fifteen, so the car wouldn't crash, the kid could make it on her own with the car. She'd make it for awhile, might even catch up to the group. The kid deserved to be apart of a real family, even if it wasn’t her own/   
  
Jane's eyes widened and she clenched her jaw and spat out her insult, wanting nothing more than to kill him, Jane's hands shook and the sorrow in her guts turned to anger.

 

"You Drug-loving turd waffle, you freaking selfish fuck, you freaked the fuck out? It's the end of the fucking world, shit happens!” Her voice shook as her hands clenched about the gun. 

 

Seeing his dumb fucked up brain matter on the window behind him, would bring Jane joy, but she knew that small joy wouldn’t last and neither would she. The girl knew she was a kid and couldn’t do all of this on her own.

 

“And you were taking our pain pills and our antibiotics. All the while you fucking knew she was dead! You lied to me!" The girl glared over him making the guilt rise up like vomit. 

 

It was just a moment later that she grabbed the pain pills and threw them out his window, before kicking her dashboard in huffs of anger over and over again with gun resting on her head.

 

The rapid repetitive kicking reminded him of Rose, just after she got bit, the rapid beating on his ribs, the bruising that reminded him of her kickings. They dealt with guilt the same way.    
  
"Really, really, you got be joking, please, please, please, god..” Jane sighed and covered her mouth as sweat lined her baby hairs, everything in her being didn’t want this to be true, but there it was plain as day.

 

“...Was she in pain?” The girl  spoke before breaking back down into her rambled sobs.  “Fuck..fuck..i don't have anyone else." Merle felt tears go through his eyes, and though he knew part of it was just from the loss of the drugs he was easing off of, the man would admit that most of it came from guilt.

 

The kid didn't have anyone else did she, even when he would take her somewhere nice with kids, they would be strangers to her.   
  
"No, she wasn't ..I made sure she didn't know it was coming and she was still her...she just couldn't keep going, but wanted me to get to you." Jane sobbed tossing down her gun onto the floorboard and glaring at him tiredly. 

 

Her youthful face was covered in sweated exhaustion though her eyes burned with hate. The dog had climbed through the back and settled on the girls lap to rest on her as though it knew that Jane needed some comfort.   
  
The girl let out shaky breaths and clenched her jaw before tiredly looking away and burying herself in the dogs fur. "I didn't tell you before..I wanted you to be able to see the group and for some mothering woman out there to take care of you," He shifted slightly eyeing her. "I didn't mean to give you false hope."   
  
The girl said nothing and held her sisters necklace tightly staring at the  nothingness as she felt the weight of this new world crush her. This wasn't right.   
  
Jane's P.O.V   
  
This wasn't right, this wasn't supposed to happen, Rose was supposed to be here, She was supposed to make it, she had promised. 

 

This was all I could think as the temperature in my head raised and vision became blurred with tears that I couldn't manage to swallow down, the necklace became a hanging smudge of blue and silver as shakey gasps escaped me.   
  
What would she tell me...What would mother tell me..what am I supposed to do, Nor her or Rose could answer. I gripped the roots of my hair sniffling as I closed my eyes only to clear the tears from them, nothing came.

 

No haunting words of wisdom, no sign that it'd be okay just the sound of the car’s wheels going over gravel and my  breathing. Letting out an exhale I looked to the road, a single walker sumbles about their hands reaching out to our passing car, wantingly.   
  
A urge went throughout me, sitting here next to the man who was responsible for Rose dying,the thought  makes my hand twitch and anger go through me. Why was i doing nothing but crying. 

 

I slam my fist on Merle's knee, the car suddenly stops do to his foot slamming on the brake. I get out while Burns slides to the floor board and Merle starts to shout at me for my actions.   
  
I can breathe, the open air makes hyperventilating easier, my legs are weak though, and I stumble gripping my blade as I hold my hair back and empty my stomach onto the pavement. 

 

Taking in gulps of air, I turn to the moaning corpse heading towards me, with my blurred vision, it almost looks like her.   
  
My hands shake angrily and I shove her, my dead sister, away. "You were supposed to come back, you were supposed to be here with me, you said you wouldn’t leave." Rose groans annoyed at me,  in response and angrily I plunge the blade into her stomach. 

 

She doesn't even say anything, why isn't she saying or doing anything, why did she leave. My head is reeling with the unanswered questions and the grief    
  
Nothing feels real,  I scream at her slamming her away as her blood drenches  my hand in crimson, her dulled eyes stare at me in disappointment, gut wrenching anguish strikes me. 

 

"You promised, You are disappointed of me, but you promised-you said you wouldn't leave! where are you now, where the fuck are you,” her feet limply move towards me. 

 

“I am alone here with no one, with nothing, how fucking dare you? You  promised me" In a moment of seeing red, somehow I am now on top of her, my hands in Roses matted hair as I slam her head back into the ground over and over again   
  
_ i'm sorry _ . "NO! If you were sorry, if you really were fucking fucking sorry, you'd still be here. why aren't you here....why did you leave me...you liar…” Hoarse pain takes over my throat, but my anger manages to push through it and i continue

 

“You left me to save some druggy, you left me with him! After everything, you left me alone...." My breath quivers and sound and sight returns in an instant. 

 

The sun is beating down upon me, the stench of rot hits me and the puddly remains of the walker cover my finger tips. The blade lays drenched in the center of the things chest, sunken in like a shattered pumpkins shell.

 

Swaying slightly, I jump when a pressure comes over my shoulder,only to drop the pocket knife back onto the corpse,when I see it's Merle touching my shoulder ever so gently with his stump.

 

He has a sympathetic- worried gaze, brows scrunched slightly and eyes soft as they look over me.   
  
Shakily standing up and ignoring the man, I wipe off the blood on my drenched shirt, only for Merle to hold out a box of baby wipes . Abandoning the knife and taking in steady breaths I managed a hoarse thanks before taking them and cleaning off the crimson. I hear Burns barking and feel the blood beginning to dry just as I close my eyes and wipe it away.   
  
i could still see Rose, the zombie version of her, jaw hanging by flesh skin grey yellow with glazed over emerald eyes staring down at me. I let out a ragged breath before quickly taking my bag from the back and eyeing the man with boiling anger. 

 

"you can look the fuck away, if I was going to kill myself I would have fucking made you crash the car." The man scoffed and stepped away, I slipped off the blood soaked jacket and top before changing into a long sleeved blue shirt. 

 

My hair was still matted by the blood and wincing hatefully as it tangled in my fingers, I decided I didn't need it. Pulling out the knife from my back pocket I begin to cut off my locks.    
  
The pressure of pulling my hair taunt and sliding the blade across it made me wince slightly before I let out a breath and continued about my matted head. I didn't need them.

 

Rose had wanted to cut off my hair awhile ago, we were waiting until the winter had passed for us to cut away our hair and match up as two brothers instead.   
  
Merle came about ten minutes later and let out a sigh almost amused by what I was doing, I couldn't have cared what he thought, it was mourning, this was part of it. I remembered Rose reading up on Indian culture and how women would shave their head for mourning and stay indoors for a year after their husbands died.   
  
"you're gonna need help kiddo?" My brow raised as I cut away another lock. 

 

"I’m gonna need you to shut the fuck up." Merle's brow raised and he rolled his eyes as he sat down next to her. "Let me help...we're going to have to get along for now, you want to chop off your hair, let me make sure you look more like a boy and less like a basket case."   
  
Relinquestioning the knife I looked down at my hands before straightening out my back. 

 

"I'm gonna need you to hold the locks out straight for me, i'm not going to be able to cut it evenly otherwise." Following his instructions, I managed to put up with the man who killed my sister, knowing that for now I needed him a live, and that despite how much I disliked him, he was the only person I had at the moment.   
  
It was only half an hour later and my head felt light and empty without my locks surrounding my face. "gonna need to take a dip in the stream to get the rest of the blood and stuff off, there's one just off the road a bit, you mind going in there a bit, keep the gun with you, i'mma gonna search the cars and get some gas, don't shower and strip, dip your head and hands, and if shit goes wrong, you come back here."   
  
With brow raised I rolled my eyes heatedly glaring at him. "Give me the keys, I don't trust you." Merle sighed and fished them out of his pocket and held them out to me with a small kind smile, why was he so understanding of all of this?   
  
Why wasn't he easier to hate? I couldn't hate him though  could I? Merle had kept his promise to Rose, he had kept me safe despite his dislike for me, despite the fact that he was alone now to, he had taken me where he thought his group was at.    
  
"I am sorry-"I know...shut up and get to searching."    
  
Regular P.O.V.    
  
Merle scavenged through the cars with a small amount of joy as he found drugs, clothes and medical wrappings. The clothes were not only for him, he found some items which he thought would fit the girl, one thing in which was a loose beanie which he thought Jane would appreciate with her newest hair due.    
  
Merle found a sweater and army coat for himself as well, just in case for when it started to get colder. Merle swayed slightly finding his hand aching, well the place where it once was, throbbing. 

 

He had just made it to the  car, halfway into the passenger seat when he fainted. Jane found him like that, passed out with door open, and leg hanging out like a meat stick for a dog, was this man really trying to get himself killed right now?

 

"Damnit." She whispered drying her hair as she shoved his leg into the car before quickly shutting the door and moving around with the items, he had gathered, in hand.   
  
Burns followed her and the girl shot a glare to the unconscious man. His wound smelled oddly and she saw beads of sweat drip down his face. Infection? Jane hadn't seen a bite on his leg so that must mean his nub wasn't properly cleaned.    
  
Jane shut the driver side door before starting up the engine. "We'll get to a safer place and then i'll fix your fucking wound."  He was not really here, so wasn’t able to hear her, but with everything else going on the girl allowed herself to talk to him. 

 

She drove for a few miles, taking it slow while avoid  the abandoned cars. “If you were awake, i’d be able to fucking get some shit from there. Once again you’re fucking things up.”  Her hands tightened about the steering wheel though, Jane refused to let her tears    
  
"Daryl...yall...old shit face...imma gonna..." The Dixon was muttering and Jane raised a brow looking over to the side road where a dirt trail laid prominently with secure fence and no signs of the dead.    
  
Turning over towards it Jane hopped out and cut the chain tying up the rusted fence to its secure pole.

 

When she got back in the car, Dixon was blurrily blinking up at her with odd curiosity.  "Rosie...thought you'd gone...to that show of yours," His lip quirked up lightly as he stared passed her, not even talking to Jane..speaking to the ghost of her sister.    
  
"....i'mma sorry...you know I am.." She cut her teary gaze from him looked, forward, and drove, a few miles down the road, with sun setting, the girl saw the cabin.

 

They pulled over in front of it and ignoring the sweating blubbering man, Jane got out of the car with betsy following her footsteps. The night wind was blowing and she shivered as her feet met the creaking step.

 

Noise from inside made her swallow, Jane would have to kill her first- no second halfer without Rose being able to hear her count.    
  
Betsy whined though they continued forward opening the front door, letting the musky air of the cabin escaped, it was worse than the scent of Merle's wound. The first dead stumbled out quickly and her knife  quickly ended it before pulling it back and going out for the next one.   
  
After them there was nothing, no noise, only silence as she dragged them a bit aways and piled up the bodies. Jane did not drag the man out until she had searched all of the rooms and unloaded some of the supplies along with noise makers on the perimeter of the cabin. 

 

She’d put them up after he was laying down. 

  
The girl hated Merle for another moment until she tossed him on the dusty velvet couch with wounded arm hanging over towards the edge. Jane moved towards the kitchen opening the fridge and shutting the door immediately only to open its once more and take a plate of leftover stakes out.    
  
Of course, no one in their right mind would eat it so she sat, cut away his bandages, washed it a bit, and took out tweezers to pick up  the maggots and put them on to his festering wound. Once again she searched through the pills and force fed him antibiotics.    
  
Not even six hours ago had Jane had a gun pointed at his head, now she was taking care of him in a dirt riddled abandoned cabin. She still hated him, that hadn't changed, but under necessity she needed him alive. That was it.    
  
With in a few hours, in which she had used the well they had out back to gather up water, made a fire to heat the water, and took out more than enough stuff for our short stay, the maggots had eaten away at his rotten dead flesh.    
  
she removed them before washing away the puss that had arisen from the gaping wound. Merle had laid their unresponsive with  a glazed look about his eyes. 

 

"De...you betta run, ain't gonna make it with pa chasing both of us-""Shut the fuck up." Jane was too tired to pretend and try to care about the man's hallucinations. 

 

He could have got bit, he could die from this infection, Merle was supposed to be taking care of her. Yet here she, the child was, nursing him back to health all the while, she really wanted to kill him.    
  
Jane covered him up and stood ears prickling from the cold as she looked about the cabin. "Burns, stay here, watch him." The chocolate lab tilted its head and she shot her a warning look before heading to the restroom.    
  
Standing tall to see herself, the girl was almost thankful that Dixon had been there to cut away her hair. It was close to even as close as it could get and as she put on the beanie Merle had gifted to her, she looked better, different, not in the way that she looked like a boy, but in the way that she looked older.   
  
Jane didn't waste the sunlight, taking in the piles of wood and nailing shut the windows with boards, she also moved the car so that it was safely hidden in the cabins garage. 

  
Afterwards before darkness fell entirely, the girl had set up the noise makers and traps. Just like rose had taught her.   
  
The days went on like that, scavenge the woods, use the supplies, change bandages and force feed Merle the pills, only variation happened on the third day when a hoard past by them and she had to keep Betsy silent.    
  
they passed and left Jane with the job of killing off stragglers.    
  
after a particularly rough morning of spraining her ankle and dirting up one of her last clean outfits, Jane came home to Burns and  ever mumbling Merle who had seemingly thrown up the last can of soup.    
  
"I am so sick of this, everyday you're a fucking mess, you shit, you piss and you just waste my and Rose's fucking supplies I should just-" Jane tore out her knife from the belt breathing heavily as she glared at him.   
  
She wanted to kill Merle, who after five days had thrown up, shit and pissed himself, but she didn't. The girl knew why she put up with him though, wiping him down and heating up water, because despite him being a waste of supplies and pathetic excuse of a human being, he was still human.    
  
That was more than she could say about the majority of the population.


	4. Chapter Four- A helping hand....

On the sixth day Jane fed Merle homemade stew, it contained just squirrel bits, clean water and cabbage, but it was at least something that he could eat. Though he could have eaten things, probably kept them down too, that were not homemade, the girl didn’t know how well he was actually doing.

Any day he could die, he might be so she saved most of the food supplies for herself. Just in case.

"Janee...you...should go, i'm sick and you should have killed me long ago..i know i would have." His eyes met hers, still glassy and weak in their gaze, Jane still wasn’t sure if he could actually see her, and if he did he noticed her tired eyes. 

Despite her hatred for him, she was glad that Merle was getting better, he had been since her ranting the day before. Yelling, not love, seemed to be the best medicine in this case.

He was getting better, slowly, unbelievably slowly, his temperature had gone down, he hadn't thrown up the stew from last night. 

"You'd like that wouldn't you, and how long do you think i'd last out there? I'm going into town for supplies-""Don't come back, I ain't worth it." Jane drank her half of the stew before tossing off food for the dog as she stood. 

"Don't I know it? But you're all I got." Merle didn’t answer and curled into the blanket she had gave to him. 

Part of her, the large hateful part of her wanted to let him die, the smaller and smarter part of her wanted him to live, what she had told him was true. 

But Jane also wanted him to suffer, like she would have to, each day thinking about what he took from her, how he took Rose’s life away.   
Jane felt anger more than she did numbness, though her hateful fever was almost matched by her fear of being alone. 

Driving back out from the cabin’s dirt road wasn't difficult, she made sure to set up the traps just after the gate, so at least if anyone came it would slow them down. 

Jane had armored up and left the majority of the stuff she had back at the house. It was better to look like Jane had nothing of value if she ran into others and if she didn’t come back, at least Dixon would have some stuff to hold him over.

 

The girl knew that her first stop had to be the vets, they had drugs there that would work just as well on humans as it did on the animals. Rose had told her that much, knowing most people, they probably had just went to the pharmacies and hospitals. 

Burns came with her, padding along and sniffing happily at the corpses and burnt abandoned vehicles. Jane stepped carefully about the bodies, staring uneasily at their bloody loose skin and battered rotted brains which decorated the road.

To be ignorant, to be so full of that light or just to be like she had been, less than a week before, was all the girl could want as reality weighed down on her. 

Jane couldn't ignore the fact she was slowly helping the man who had killed her sister, get back into health, that they would never find his group, and that she was never going to grow up. 

That part of her didn’t even want to try, the world was shit any how.

A moment passed in the silent ruins of the town she was scavenging, when Jane stared down at a crimsoned childs shoe, knowing exactly what had happened to its owner, who's remains laid not even a foot away.

There was not enough of him to return from his final death. 

Engines cut through her dark pondering thoughts and the young girl silenced her pup who’s stance had changed into the one she used when beginning to whine and stared out at the road. 

From the barricaded window, Jane could see three trucks, heavily armed people, she was far outnumbered and outgunned. 

"Get out and let us get our supplies people, two per team." Jane shoved the medicine into her bag at the commanding voice and raced out the back careful to avoid the broken glass as she stepped. Her car was just on the edge of the lot, the girl could make it there and head out after they got into the stoor. 

The figures spread out heading to the vet and surrounding stores. Jane didn’t bother pausing as she raced behind cars and kept ahold of burns collar. She waited a few seconds until the girl was sure they were inside and then she rand.

Jane’s feet pounding onto the gravel was the only sound as she breathlessly raced to her car. After a moment, there was a snag followed by the sickening sound of a rip, she stopped and turned to see the pill bottles roll onto the ground away from her.

There was a few moments of blessed silence where Jane didn’t think they had heard, and then the horrid loud rumble of unfamiliar footsteps, The teen didn’t hesitate to grab a few of the bottles and toss off her ruined empty bag before continuing to run. 

"Don't shoot it's a dog...and a kid." A voice calls out, younger and kinder, female. The voice though came with kind intentions, causes the dead to come. 

Jane's hands shake as they near her, reaching out for the girl as burns barks angrily in defense. Her knife cuts through a few of the dead, but she sees more coming from the numerous stores the girl had passed by. 

She regretted not searching each useless store and clearing them out one by one, but her hindsight wasn’t going to help her now as she was just a meter or so away from her car. It was so close, she could reach out passed the dead and touch it. 

A shot rang out, and then another. The keys slip through her grasp as the dead begin to fall and in a quick response, Jane hops onto the hood with Betsy at her heels. 

They stand out of the reach of the dead as the girl does her best to attack despite the group shooting at the halfers. Burns pressed against her baring teeth though a tremor goes through her body.

Minutes passed, the dead have fallen, all Jane has is her pistol. pills, and hunting knife, the gun is in hand pointed at the group steadily as she tried not to focus on their faces.

Jane had never killed anyone who was alive, she didn’t want to have to now, but the girl didn’t want a lot of things and yet here she was. 

The group of adults look at her shocked, almost amazed at her bloodied leathered up appearance. It is silent for a moment until, Burns pulls her ears back and growl seemingly breaking them all from the spell. 

As the aura of awe fell, a man comes out from amongst the crowd of ten, Jane eyes him with trembling lip, he’s the leader, she knows it without even having to question herself.. 

The man has soft brown eyes, a greying scruff, and calm demeanor despite holding a revolver in his hand. Any moment he could end her life just as she could end his.

"No one shoot.” The strange man holds up his gun like he’s surrendering, a small almost calming smile lays on his lips as he eyes Jane and the dog. 

“Kid we aren't here to hurt you.,,and trust me we didn't mean to frighten you or the deados either...ya mind telling the dog there to ease up?" His lips twitch though he eyes her warily as she grips the weapon tighter.

Jane is shaking, fear courses through her at the sight of the living, clean, kind even, but she can't stop the shaking. To much has happened in these past days.

"Betsy..calm." The brown blood drenched lab immediately falls at ease with hair lowering as it sniffs the air for other threats. Her amber eyes never leaving the strangers before her.

"Good..now we're sorry about the walkers, like I said, it was not my intention...I'm philip..and you are?" Stepping back slightly Jane's hand tightens looking over his relaxed posture. 

Maybe he was good. "Ja-" It’s better to be a boy. "-mes, my name is James..." 

Philip smiles slightly noticing the less than masculan shoes she wore as he held out his hand in friendship. The girl was strong, she reminded him of his daughter. 

" well, it's a pleasure to meet you James, how about you come down? Was it just you out here? " The girl pulls back her hand with the bottle of pills and glares at him. 

"How about you leave-""you have medicine...is someone sick?" His concern sounds real, but the girl clenches her jaw and holds up her gun back up. Rose died because of some strangers, Jane wasn’t about to make the same mistake. 

"Fuck off...I didn't ask for your help....i don't need it..get back, or i’ll shoot you, i don’t care that i’m out gunned, you’ll be dead and that’s all that matters." 

He sighs almost annoyed by the child before putting on another smile, a tired one tight one which almost scared her. 

"Let's step back, we'll scavenge tomorrow-"" we can't just leave-""you heard the kid, even if we have doctors, James doesn't seem to need our help, seems darn capable on his own."

They turned, the woman who had called out looking sadly at the kid before doing so. Jane felt her heart skip a beat, she couldn't do this alone.

The girl really didn’t even care if they were evil..she was to damn tired and broken Jane knew she wouldn’t be able to do it all on her own for much longer, if merle wasn’t there the girl could have done it, but she wouldn’t just leave him.

She hadn’t cried since the walker on the side of the road, putting all her energy in taking care of the dumbass back at the cabin. Jane needed to, just for a bit, and then she’d push through,

"Wait..." Phil stopped and tilted his head before turning to see the girl slowly climb down off of the car’s roof, he had to bite back a smirk, he knew she would give in.

"Do...do you have children at your compound?" He nodded slowly eyeing the bloody girl warily now that she was agreeing, it could very well be a trap, he obviously had her out gunned right now, but wherever she was camping at, the tide could turn rather quickly.   
.  
"We do...how many people are with you?" Stepping to the driver door Jane picked up her bloody keys and shook her head, at his question at herself.

This was a stupid stupid plan.

"It's just me, Burns, and Merle...he’s my uncle...by marriage." Phil glanced at his gun for a moment thinking of pulling the trigger before scolding himself, investments were made by taking risks. 

The girl was able to fend for herself, she had the possibility to be melded into a great soldier. It's two people he could take them in, even if he couldn’t afford to, the man wouldn’t kill a kid;

"Well, i'm sorry-""Don't be shit happens, not your shit to be dealing with, it’s mine..." He chuckles lightly tilting his head at the girl and her dog who contently licked her hand and wagged its tail.

It was such a silly fucking animal to have at the end of the world. The kid seemed to be attached to it though so he’d let her keep it, would brighten up things at the compound any how.

"He bit?" Jane shook her head slowly shrugging off the question, though she was kind of ticked off that they thought she was that stupid. 

"No...his hands been cut off...long story...We have supplies though...you guys take us in and fix him up, since we're gonna be a part of your group, we’re willing to give it all to you." 

A wicked smile decorates his lips and he nods slowly, two people and a lot of supplies, this was a good investment..if it turned out to be bad, well they could always be put to use one way or another

"Lead the way...you okay with driving us there." Her brow raised and smugly with that small quiver in her hands, Jane nods. "it's my fucking car, how else do you think i got here.. " 

Phil raised his brow and looked at the girl with a small smile, he was almost proud, but thoroughly annoyed by the child's antics. “You want to ride with me teach?” Putting his gun in the holster he eyed the dog and nodded his head. 

“Let's head out, omega team stay here and search, Alpha you’re with me. “ Jane eyed him as she opened up the driver seat and put Burns into the back spot, while leaning over her eyes went over the man watching as one of his people, the woman, watched over him. 

The drive was quiet except for the leaders constant questioning to which Jane answered politely with few worded answers.

“So, how old are you any how? You drive rather well for a-””Kid? Yeah i know...I’m thirteen, how old are you Fifty?” He chuckles and shakes his head tapping his hands onto the dashboard as he swallows down salt and ignores the twitch in his finger. 

“Fourty two actually.” With a small smirk the tired girl stops the hatch back before the gate and takes the keys with her as she kicks open the metal barrier. 

A bear trap comes launching out over the gate and lands next to the girl as a chain shoots up. She doesn't see the bemused expression that covers the man's face as Jane dismantles the trap. 

After the small delay with dismantling the trap is over with, the two trucks follow one another towards the cabin and Jane lets out a breath as Philip pulls out his gun. 

“Just in case.” She parks and rolls her eyes though fingers her own weapon just in case, he wasn’t going to help her out. They exit the vehicles and she watches the other people behind her as they follow her. 

Ever so slowly she pushed open the door and let out a breath. “Janee...you back? SOrry son of a bitch I told ya to leave.” His slurred words and the pile of yet another meal wasted made her almost smile. 

“Told you i was telling the truth.” He smiles and whistles for his men to load up the supplies and the man before him, today's outing was a good investment indeed.


End file.
